I feel like I’ve lost quite a few friends since getting married and becoming a mother. I’ve talked about it before. So I’d really like to make some mummy friends.
The only trouble is, how exactly do you make friends as an adult?
When you’re younger, it’s not so bad. There are clubs and societies at university. It’s easy (for some people) to start up conversations in bars or clubs, etc. But I don’t get out much now. If I do, it’s to super-exciting places like Sainsbury’s or the petrol station. Not really places you go to socialise!
It’s probably exacerbated by the fact that my husband and I only moved to this area a couple of years ago. Between work and wanting to be at home a lot for the rabbits, I never made local friends. (Of course, my husband has loads. He picks up friends easily. So not jealous.)
So I feel like I’m starting from scratch here. I need some sort of remedial friends making class. Ironically, probably going to such a class would be a good place to make friends!
I’m very lucky in one way. Two of my closest friends had babies last year as well. Unfortunately, they both live in Wales and I don’t. But WhatsApp is an amazing tool, and I’m also able to keep up with lots of childless/childfree/older-children-having friends on there.
It’s just not quite the same as actually meeting up with someone, though.
I see my mum a couple of times a week, and my husband has hardly any commute at all, so he’s around a lot. But I think it’s important for the baby to get to see other people – and other babies. I don’t want her to go to nursery or a childminder or school and have that be the first time she’s ever really interacted with people her own age.
So I’ve done a few things.
We’re going to a weekly baby sensory class five minutes away from our house. We’ve been to one so far, and the baby wanted to feed through most of it, but did enjoy staring at the other babies. And I got to talk to some other mums, which was cool. (Most of them wanted to ask about babywearing because I had her in the wrap – I felt pretty accomplished!)
In addition, I’m part of a local Facebook group – I have been ever since we moved here, but never really contributed. I was just there to find out about travel delays, upcoming events, etc. But the other day, someone asked about setting up a group for mums who are feeling lonely or don’t really know anyone and want some mummy friends. Over 100 people replied! We’re meeting on Wednesday. Exciting!
So, wish me luck!